Here are some things you can have ready on the tip of your tongue, next time they bring up negative or embarrassing stories about you from long ago. If you complain because we have not taken the rubbish out, we will remind you how you forgot to pick up our drying cleaning on three separate occasions. If you accuse us of flirting with someone, we will remind you of your brazen behaviour with our brother. No, it is not right that your husband keeps bringing up a mistake from the past if you have learned from that mistake. If you judge me by my past don’t be surprised when you become part of it. That is not great. You’re like a plunger, you keep bringing up old shit. Ultimately, the result of reminding someone of … You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep rereading the last one. It is sad when you apologise for something like a bad money choice, but your spouse beats you up with your mistake forever.
I don’t look back; I’m not going that way. Just that it seems very unfair to you. But, it is also your responsibility to speak up about your own worries. What to say to someone who keeps bringing up your past. Don’t bring other people into the conflict either. So bringing up old disagreements during a fight simply makes your partner feel trapped and helpless. I have no advice for you. Bringing up the past is good for all occasions. It’s the only one you do have the power to change. If you judge me by my past don’t be surprised when you become part of it. Reminding someone about something they did wrong or something they did which may have hurt us may feel like it helps in the moment. What to say to someone who keeps bringing up your past.
Drop what’s been and gone and try focussing on the present issue causing your relationship conflict. There is no need to for you to keep punishing yourself for something if the company has already put it in the past. It may divert the focus away from a reality we don’t want to face, at least for a while (the real payoff). I don’t look back; I’m not going that way. How to Handle Someone Who Uses Your Past Against You We are all in a process of evolution though we progress at different rates and through different lessons.
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